AI IELTS Writing AI Correction
- Opinion
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.
스코어팩토리 AI가 에세이를 평가하였습니다.
Evaluation
Task Response: 7
- The essay responds to the task effectively. It presents a clear position throughout the response, providing relevant main ideas with full development by giving personal experience to exemplify the point.
Coherence & Cohesion: 6
- The essay is logically organized with clear progression of ideas. Each point has an evident connection, however the essay lacks the use of cohesive devices, making it a bit difficult to understand at some points.
Lexical Resource: 7
- The writer possesses a good range of vocabulary, and the vocabulary is generally used accurately. Collocations are good, and there's clear evidence of synonym usage.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 6
- The essay showcases a mix of complex and simple sentence structures. However, there are some grammatical errors, specifically noun/verb agreement, that are evident.
Overall: 6.5
Task Response: 7
- The essay responds to the task effectively. It presents a clear position throughout the response, providing relevant main ideas with full development by giving personal experience to exemplify the point.
Coherence & Cohesion: 6
- The essay is logically organized with clear progression of ideas. Each point has an evident connection, however the essay lacks the use of cohesive devices, making it a bit difficult to understand at some points.
Lexical Resource: 7
- The writer possesses a good range of vocabulary, and the vocabulary is generally used accurately. Collocations are good, and there's clear evidence of synonym usage.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 6
- The essay showcases a mix of complex and simple sentence structures. However, there are some grammatical errors, specifically noun/verb agreement, that are evident.
Overall: 6.5
스코어팩토리 AI가 작성한 모범답안입니다.
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.
Essay:
The debate on whether university students should focus solely on their major or branch out into other areas of study is an important one. It can drastically influence the choices and direction a student takes in their academic journey. While there are compelling arguments on both sides, I am of the firm belief that diversification of learning is crucial to the comprehensive development of a student.
A staunch faction believes in the significance of dedicating efforts toward academic qualifications. The current employment climate, with its high competition and shortage of opportunities, appears to necessitate such a focus. These students stake their time on honing skills pertinent to their major, with the aim of securing a career soon after graduation. Conversely, a faction of students subscribes to the idea of exploring a variety of subjects outside their major. This thought process stems from a yearning to expand their knowledge and find their genuine passion.
Despite the seemingly urgent need for specialization, I concur with the advocates of broad spectrum learning. In an increasingly interconnected world, diversity of knowledge is often the key to success. Businesses seek multifaceted individuals, with a range of skills and knowledge derived from various subjects, such as statistics for a marketing professional. Moreover, delving into other courses can enlighten students about fields they might be naturally inclined toward that otherwise would have remained unexplored. I, for instance, shifted my focus from international commerce to English literature and linguistics after discovering my true passion.
In conclusion, given these benefits, a balanced academic profile of specialization coupled with diversification seems to be a more beneficial approach for today’s students.
Word count: 259
Essay translated in Korean:
대학생들이 전공에만 집중해야하는지 아니면 다른 학문 영역으로 확장해야하는지에 대한 논쟁은 중요합니다. 학생들의 학문적 여정을 결정하는데 큰 영향을 미칩니다. 양측 모두의 주장이 강력하긴 하지만 저는 학생의 종합적 발전을 위해 다양한 학문을 배우는 것이 매우 중요하다고 확신합니다.
엄격한 세력은 학문적 자격증에 노력을 바칠 중요성을 믿습니다. 현재의 고용 환경, 경쟁이 치열하고 기회가 부족한 상황에서 이러한 초점이 필요해보입니다. 이러한 학생들은 졸업 후 곧바로 경력을 확보하려는 목표로 자신의 전공과 관련된 기술을 연마하는 데 시간을 바칩니다. 반대로, 일부 학생들은 주 전공 외의 다양한 과목을 탐구하는 것이 좋다는 생각을 공유합니다. 이런 생각은 지식을 확장하고 진정한 열정을 찾고자 하는 열망에서 비롯됩니다.
전문화에 대한 절박한 필요성에도 불구하고, 저는 넓은 범위의 학문을 지지합니다. 점점 더 상호 연결되는 세계에서 지식의 다양성은 성공의 핵심입니다. 기업들은 다양한 기술과 지식을 가진 다재다능한 사람을 찾기 때문입니다. 또한, 다른 과목을 파헤치면 학생들은 자신이 자연스럽게 기울이는 분야에 대해 알 수 있습니다. 예를 들어, 저는 내 진정한 열정을 발견한 후에 국제 상업에서 영문학과 언어학으로 관심을 전환했습니다.
결론적으로, 이러한 이점을 고려할 때, 전문화와 다양화를 결합한 균형잡힌 학문적 프로필이 오늘날의 학생들에게 더 유익한 접근법인 것 같습니다.
Good expressions:
1. 'A staunch faction' - 엄격한 세력
2. 'Multifaceted individuals' - 다재다능한 사람
3. 'Enlighten students' - 학생들에게 깨우치게 하다
4. 'A balanced academic profile' - 균형잡힌 학문적 프로필
5. 'Broad spectrum learning - 넓은 범위의 학습
The debate on whether university students should focus solely on their major or branch out into other areas of study is an important one. It can drastically influence the choices and direction a student takes in their academic journey. While there are compelling arguments on both sides, I am of the firm belief that diversification of learning is crucial to the comprehensive development of a student.
A staunch faction believes in the significance of dedicating efforts toward academic qualifications. The current employment climate, with its high competition and shortage of opportunities, appears to necessitate such a focus. These students stake their time on honing skills pertinent to their major, with the aim of securing a career soon after graduation. Conversely, a faction of students subscribes to the idea of exploring a variety of subjects outside their major. This thought process stems from a yearning to expand their knowledge and find their genuine passion.
Despite the seemingly urgent need for specialization, I concur with the advocates of broad spectrum learning. In an increasingly interconnected world, diversity of knowledge is often the key to success. Businesses seek multifaceted individuals, with a range of skills and knowledge derived from various subjects, such as statistics for a marketing professional. Moreover, delving into other courses can enlighten students about fields they might be naturally inclined toward that otherwise would have remained unexplored. I, for instance, shifted my focus from international commerce to English literature and linguistics after discovering my true passion.
In conclusion, given these benefits, a balanced academic profile of specialization coupled with diversification seems to be a more beneficial approach for today’s students.
Word count: 259
Essay translated in Korean:
대학생들이 전공에만 집중해야하는지 아니면 다른 학문 영역으로 확장해야하는지에 대한 논쟁은 중요합니다. 학생들의 학문적 여정을 결정하는데 큰 영향을 미칩니다. 양측 모두의 주장이 강력하긴 하지만 저는 학생의 종합적 발전을 위해 다양한 학문을 배우는 것이 매우 중요하다고 확신합니다.
엄격한 세력은 학문적 자격증에 노력을 바칠 중요성을 믿습니다. 현재의 고용 환경, 경쟁이 치열하고 기회가 부족한 상황에서 이러한 초점이 필요해보입니다. 이러한 학생들은 졸업 후 곧바로 경력을 확보하려는 목표로 자신의 전공과 관련된 기술을 연마하는 데 시간을 바칩니다. 반대로, 일부 학생들은 주 전공 외의 다양한 과목을 탐구하는 것이 좋다는 생각을 공유합니다. 이런 생각은 지식을 확장하고 진정한 열정을 찾고자 하는 열망에서 비롯됩니다.
전문화에 대한 절박한 필요성에도 불구하고, 저는 넓은 범위의 학문을 지지합니다. 점점 더 상호 연결되는 세계에서 지식의 다양성은 성공의 핵심입니다. 기업들은 다양한 기술과 지식을 가진 다재다능한 사람을 찾기 때문입니다. 또한, 다른 과목을 파헤치면 학생들은 자신이 자연스럽게 기울이는 분야에 대해 알 수 있습니다. 예를 들어, 저는 내 진정한 열정을 발견한 후에 국제 상업에서 영문학과 언어학으로 관심을 전환했습니다.
결론적으로, 이러한 이점을 고려할 때, 전문화와 다양화를 결합한 균형잡힌 학문적 프로필이 오늘날의 학생들에게 더 유익한 접근법인 것 같습니다.
Good expressions:
1. 'A staunch faction' - 엄격한 세력
2. 'Multifaceted individuals' - 다재다능한 사람
3. 'Enlighten students' - 학생들에게 깨우치게 하다
4. 'A balanced academic profile' - 균형잡힌 학문적 프로필
5. 'Broad spectrum learning - 넓은 범위의 학습
제출한 라이팅
What students learn in college matters because it helps students to decide on which career to pursue after graduating from college. Regarding such a matter, many people contend that it is far more significant to take courses for a qualification, while some university students desire to learn more about other subjects. Although some people may argue that giving all attention to studying for a qualification is important, I believe that students should expand their knowledge by taking other desirable courses outside of their major.
Many people believe that it is more significant to focusing on studying for a qualification. Additionally, since there are less job opportunities opened for college graduates nowadays, students worry that if they can't get a job immediately. Such high unemployment rates trigger students to focus on completing the qualification for a graduation as soon as possible and spare their time on other extracurricular activities related to their major. On the other hand, some students want to take courses of other major becuase they want to expand knowledge or find the career that they are interested in.
Despite the numerious people's belief, I agree with the statement that students can take courses outside of their own major. Nowadays, societies want more students with a wide scope of knowledge in various fields because when a company assigns a task, it usually requires various skills or knowledge student may have learned in different fields, such as stastistics and business marketing. Since a company is in need of college graduates with various knowledge, students should take courses that they are interested in and develop their knowledge. Additionally, taking other courses outside of their major helps students find which career they truly want to pursue. For example, when I was in college, I was able to have a chance to take courses of English linguistics and literature. At that time, I didnot enjoy my major international commerce, considering it to be difficult to understand. When I took English linguistics courses, I found the theory of how the sounds are created and how the words combined together to form a sentence more enjoyable. In other words, because of taking other courses, I could realize that I am more passionate about learning linguistics and literature. Consequently, I transferred to English linguistics and literature major to become an English teacher. Thus, with such reasons, I believe that students can take other course for the sake of expanding their knowledge to become a intergrated learner and finding the career that is perfectly fit for them.
Many people believe that it is more significant to focusing on studying for a qualification. Additionally, since there are less job opportunities opened for college graduates nowadays, students worry that if they can't get a job immediately. Such high unemployment rates trigger students to focus on completing the qualification for a graduation as soon as possible and spare their time on other extracurricular activities related to their major. On the other hand, some students want to take courses of other major becuase they want to expand knowledge or find the career that they are interested in.
Despite the numerious people's belief, I agree with the statement that students can take courses outside of their own major. Nowadays, societies want more students with a wide scope of knowledge in various fields because when a company assigns a task, it usually requires various skills or knowledge student may have learned in different fields, such as stastistics and business marketing. Since a company is in need of college graduates with various knowledge, students should take courses that they are interested in and develop their knowledge. Additionally, taking other courses outside of their major helps students find which career they truly want to pursue. For example, when I was in college, I was able to have a chance to take courses of English linguistics and literature. At that time, I didnot enjoy my major international commerce, considering it to be difficult to understand. When I took English linguistics courses, I found the theory of how the sounds are created and how the words combined together to form a sentence more enjoyable. In other words, because of taking other courses, I could realize that I am more passionate about learning linguistics and literature. Consequently, I transferred to English linguistics and literature major to become an English teacher. Thus, with such reasons, I believe that students can take other course for the sake of expanding their knowledge to become a intergrated learner and finding the career that is perfectly fit for them.
공유
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