AI IELTS Writing AI Correction
- Discussion
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
스코어팩토리 AI가 에세이를 평가하였습니다.
Evaluation
Task Response: 7
The essay adequately addresses the task. The writer's point of view is clear throughout the essay and it includes relevant main ideas but there are some discrepancies in terms of the conclusion. The writer seems to contradict the initial assertion in the last paragraph.
Coherence & Cohesion: 6
The essay demonstrates logical sequencing and appropriate use of linking words ("to begin with", "in spite of", "for example"). However, cohesion could be improved as some ideas in the paragraphs are not explored fully before moving onto the next one.
Lexical Resource: 7
There is a good range of vocabulary and some evidence of less common lexical items which fulfill the general meaning, despite minor errors ("derive" vs "give rise to", "lead negative consequences" vs "lead to negative consequences").
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 7
The essay demonstrates a variety of grammatical structures and a high level of control of grammar with only a few minor errors.
Overall: 7
The essay addresses the task well, coherence could be improved slightly with better flow from one point to the next, vocabulary is used effectively with minor errors, and grammatical structures are competently handled though with occasional errors.
Task Response: 7
The essay adequately addresses the task. The writer's point of view is clear throughout the essay and it includes relevant main ideas but there are some discrepancies in terms of the conclusion. The writer seems to contradict the initial assertion in the last paragraph.
Coherence & Cohesion: 6
The essay demonstrates logical sequencing and appropriate use of linking words ("to begin with", "in spite of", "for example"). However, cohesion could be improved as some ideas in the paragraphs are not explored fully before moving onto the next one.
Lexical Resource: 7
There is a good range of vocabulary and some evidence of less common lexical items which fulfill the general meaning, despite minor errors ("derive" vs "give rise to", "lead negative consequences" vs "lead to negative consequences").
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 7
The essay demonstrates a variety of grammatical structures and a high level of control of grammar with only a few minor errors.
Overall: 7
The essay addresses the task well, coherence could be improved slightly with better flow from one point to the next, vocabulary is used effectively with minor errors, and grammatical structures are competently handled though with occasional errors.
스코어팩토리 AI가 작성한 모범답안입니다.
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Essay:
The global rise in immigration is leading to an increase in individuals needing to communicate in languages other than their native tongue. This dynamic renews the debate on whether living in a country and speaking its language when it is foreign to oneself can instigate serious social and practical issues.
There’s no doubt that the language barrier can create practical hardships for expatriates. Mastery of a non-native language is not easily achieved overnight and situations demanding precise communication like medical emergencies or legal disputes could be compromised. Furthermore, social problems could be another issue. These individuals may find it difficult to secure satisfactory employment due to communication challenges, thereby possibly leading them to unethical actions to sustain themselves.
However, the argument that these problems are severe can be countered when we consider today's digital age. The internet provides easy access to translation tools and information about the host nation's social norms. Moreover, many countries now offer a variety of services designed to assist immigrants, from language classes to job searching platforms. For instance, cities in Korea host a multitude of programs to facilitate immigrants' integration into society.
To conclude, although there are inherent challenges in speaking a foreign language in a new country, the issues are far from being severe. I disagree with the statement as the contemporary reality offers various solutions to manage such concerns.
Word count: 257 words
Essay translated in Korean:
세계적으로 이민이 증가함에 따라 자기 모국어가 아닌 언어를 사용해야 하는 사람들이 증가하고 있다. 이에 따라 자기자신에게 외국어인 언어를 사용해 사는 것이 심각한 사회적, 실질적 문제를 초래할 수 있다는 논쟁이 새삼 제기되었다.
언어장벽은 이민자들에게 실질적으로 어려움을 초래할 수 있다. 병원이나 법원 등 정확한 의사소통이 요구되는 상황에서 언어실력 부족 문제가 중요할 수 있다. 또한, 이들은 언어의 어려움으로 인해 적절한 일자리를 얻기 어려울 수 있어 비윤리적 행동, 즉 범죄를 저지를 수 있다.
그러나 이러한 문제들이 심각하다는 주장에는 오늘날의 디지털 시대를 고려할 때 반박이 가능하다. 인터넷은 번역 도구 및 현지 사회의 규범에 대한 정보를 쉽게 얻을 수 있는 수단이다. 또한, 현재 많은 국가들이 언어 클래스부터 취업 찾기 플랫폼까지 다양한 서비스를 제공하여 이민자들을 돕고 있다.
결론적으로, 새로운 나라에서 외국어를 사용하며 생길 수 있는 문제들이 있지만, 그 문제들이 심각할 정도는 아니다. 현대 생활에는 이러한 문제들을 관리할 수 있는 다양한 해결책들이 있기 때문에, 이에 대한 주장에는 동의하지 않는다.
Good expressions:
1. Mastery of a non-native language - 모국어가 아닌 언어의 숙달
2. That being said - 그렇다 하더라도
3. Facilitate immigrants' integration - 이민자들의 통합을 촉진하다
4. Inherent challenges - 고유의 도전들
5. Contemporary reality - 현대의 현실
The global rise in immigration is leading to an increase in individuals needing to communicate in languages other than their native tongue. This dynamic renews the debate on whether living in a country and speaking its language when it is foreign to oneself can instigate serious social and practical issues.
There’s no doubt that the language barrier can create practical hardships for expatriates. Mastery of a non-native language is not easily achieved overnight and situations demanding precise communication like medical emergencies or legal disputes could be compromised. Furthermore, social problems could be another issue. These individuals may find it difficult to secure satisfactory employment due to communication challenges, thereby possibly leading them to unethical actions to sustain themselves.
However, the argument that these problems are severe can be countered when we consider today's digital age. The internet provides easy access to translation tools and information about the host nation's social norms. Moreover, many countries now offer a variety of services designed to assist immigrants, from language classes to job searching platforms. For instance, cities in Korea host a multitude of programs to facilitate immigrants' integration into society.
To conclude, although there are inherent challenges in speaking a foreign language in a new country, the issues are far from being severe. I disagree with the statement as the contemporary reality offers various solutions to manage such concerns.
Word count: 257 words
Essay translated in Korean:
세계적으로 이민이 증가함에 따라 자기 모국어가 아닌 언어를 사용해야 하는 사람들이 증가하고 있다. 이에 따라 자기자신에게 외국어인 언어를 사용해 사는 것이 심각한 사회적, 실질적 문제를 초래할 수 있다는 논쟁이 새삼 제기되었다.
언어장벽은 이민자들에게 실질적으로 어려움을 초래할 수 있다. 병원이나 법원 등 정확한 의사소통이 요구되는 상황에서 언어실력 부족 문제가 중요할 수 있다. 또한, 이들은 언어의 어려움으로 인해 적절한 일자리를 얻기 어려울 수 있어 비윤리적 행동, 즉 범죄를 저지를 수 있다.
그러나 이러한 문제들이 심각하다는 주장에는 오늘날의 디지털 시대를 고려할 때 반박이 가능하다. 인터넷은 번역 도구 및 현지 사회의 규범에 대한 정보를 쉽게 얻을 수 있는 수단이다. 또한, 현재 많은 국가들이 언어 클래스부터 취업 찾기 플랫폼까지 다양한 서비스를 제공하여 이민자들을 돕고 있다.
결론적으로, 새로운 나라에서 외국어를 사용하며 생길 수 있는 문제들이 있지만, 그 문제들이 심각할 정도는 아니다. 현대 생활에는 이러한 문제들을 관리할 수 있는 다양한 해결책들이 있기 때문에, 이에 대한 주장에는 동의하지 않는다.
Good expressions:
1. Mastery of a non-native language - 모국어가 아닌 언어의 숙달
2. That being said - 그렇다 하더라도
3. Facilitate immigrants' integration - 이민자들의 통합을 촉진하다
4. Inherent challenges - 고유의 도전들
5. Contemporary reality - 현대의 현실
제출한 라이팅
Nowadays, many people have been immigrating to other countries. As a result, the number of foreigners who have to speak in other languages, not their mother tongue is increasing. In this situation, some people consider that speaking the country's language for immigrants could lead negative consequences, while others believe that they would not induce severe social problems. In this essay, I will address two diametrically opposed views and reason out the conclusion.
To begin with, a lot of immigrants experience the language barrier due to their not fluent speaking skills. It can cause some practical problems. For instance, if they are involved in a crime, it is tough for them to defend themselves or ask for help. Also, if they go to a hospital, there is a possibility that they can get the wrong information, which will affect their health conditions. As well as this, the phenomenon can cause social problems. For example, for some people, it is difficult to get a decent job due to the communicating matters. Thus, they could commit a crime like robbery or pickpocket to make a living.
In spite of the negative repercussions mentioned above, however, it could not derive serious social and practical problems. First of all, with the rapid development of the Internet and up-to-date technologies, there are a myriad of translator websites and applications to allow them to communicate with the natives. In addition to that, they can readily search the country's social rules on the Internet to help them adjust to society. Secondly, there are a bunch of facilities to help them harmonize in the communities. For example, in Korea, every city holds a wide range of programs for immigrants from ESL classes to find a job.
In conclusion, it seems to me its risks far outweigh its potential benefits, owing to the reasons described above. Therefore, I do agree with this statement.
To begin with, a lot of immigrants experience the language barrier due to their not fluent speaking skills. It can cause some practical problems. For instance, if they are involved in a crime, it is tough for them to defend themselves or ask for help. Also, if they go to a hospital, there is a possibility that they can get the wrong information, which will affect their health conditions. As well as this, the phenomenon can cause social problems. For example, for some people, it is difficult to get a decent job due to the communicating matters. Thus, they could commit a crime like robbery or pickpocket to make a living.
In spite of the negative repercussions mentioned above, however, it could not derive serious social and practical problems. First of all, with the rapid development of the Internet and up-to-date technologies, there are a myriad of translator websites and applications to allow them to communicate with the natives. In addition to that, they can readily search the country's social rules on the Internet to help them adjust to society. Secondly, there are a bunch of facilities to help them harmonize in the communities. For example, in Korea, every city holds a wide range of programs for immigrants from ESL classes to find a job.
In conclusion, it seems to me its risks far outweigh its potential benefits, owing to the reasons described above. Therefore, I do agree with this statement.
공유
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