아이엘츠 라이팅 AI 첨삭
- Opinion
The demand for coaching services has grown significantly in the digital age, with online coaching platforms becoming prevalent. Some now feel online coaching is a superior option to in-person coach. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
스코어팩토리 AI가 에세이를 평가하였습니다.
Evaluation
Task Response: 7.5
The student clearly addresses the prompt and takes a clear position disagreeing with the statement. They establish their argument, provide reasons and examples to support their stand, and effectively conclude their argument. However, they could offer a more balanced argument with clear points for both sides.
Coherence & Cohesion: 7
There is a clear overall progression of ideas with the use of some linking words, which helps to connect the sections of the essay. However, it could be improved with more coherent argumentation and a stronger connection between ideas.
Lexical Resource: 7
The student demonstrates a good range of vocabulary with generally well-controlled, error-free use. They could use more advanced words and idioms to show a really sophisticated command of English vocabulary.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 7
Although the student uses a variety of sentence structures, present forms, and has an understanding of complex grammar, there are some minor errors. More advanced grammatical structures would be beneficial.
Overall: 7.1
Task Response: 7.5
The student clearly addresses the prompt and takes a clear position disagreeing with the statement. They establish their argument, provide reasons and examples to support their stand, and effectively conclude their argument. However, they could offer a more balanced argument with clear points for both sides.
Coherence & Cohesion: 7
There is a clear overall progression of ideas with the use of some linking words, which helps to connect the sections of the essay. However, it could be improved with more coherent argumentation and a stronger connection between ideas.
Lexical Resource: 7
The student demonstrates a good range of vocabulary with generally well-controlled, error-free use. They could use more advanced words and idioms to show a really sophisticated command of English vocabulary.
Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 7
Although the student uses a variety of sentence structures, present forms, and has an understanding of complex grammar, there are some minor errors. More advanced grammatical structures would be beneficial.
Overall: 7.1
스코어팩토리 AI가 작성한 모범답안입니다.
The demand for coaching services has grown significantly in the digital age, with online coaching platforms becoming prevalent. Some now feel online coaching is a superior option to in-person coach.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Essay:
In the modern era, the appeal of online coaching platforms has soared alongside the proliferation of the digital age. However, there is a debate concerning the superiority of these platforms over traditional in-person coaching. While some extol the virtues of this emerging trend, I find myself at odds with its perceived supremacy.
The rise in popularity for online coaching can, in part, be attributed to a societal lack of confidence and growing uncertainty about future prospects. In an era teeming with options, individuals often become lost, succumbing to a paralyzing confusion. The allure of online coaching is understandable in such predicaments, but it is my belief that individuals should take personal ownership of their goals and strive towards them. After all, a determined pursuit of one's objectives can serve as its own powerful form of coaching.
Additionally, while online coaching platforms are undeniably accessible, their one-size-fits-all approach does not account for the unique circumstances and traits of each individual. Furthermore, the reliability of these platforms is questionable. Despite these issues, proponents of online coaching argue that they offer valuable insights guaranteed to aid in one's success. However, it is my contention that true success hinges more on self-belief and persistent efforts, factors which can not be delivered by a digital platform.
In sum, while the demand for online coaching has undoubtedly surged, this does not necessarily signal an inherent inadequacy in individuals' self-guidance abilities.
Word count: 256
Essay translated in Korean:
현대시대에는 디지털 시대의 연장선상에서 온라인 코칭 플랫폼의 매력이 급증했습니다. 그러나 이러한 플랫폼이 전통적인 대면 코칭보다 우월한지에 대한 논란이 있습니다. 일부는 이 새로운 추세를 칭송하지만, 저는 그것의 우월성에 부정적인 입장을 취하고 있습니다.
온라인 코칭에 대한 인기 상승은 일정 부분, 사회적인 자신감 부족과 미래 전망에 대한 지속적인 불확실성 때문일 것입니다. 선택지가 많은 시대에서, 사람들은 종종 자신을 잃고 혼란스러운 상태에 빠져들곤 합니다. 이러한 상황에서 온라인 코칭의 매력은 이해할 수 있으나, 개인이 자신의 목표를 직접 정하고 그것을 향해 노력해야 한다고 믿습니다. 결국, 자신의 목표를 확고히 추구하는 것은 자체로 강력한 코칭의 형태가 될 수 있습니다.
또한, 온라인 코칭 플랫폼은 의심할 만큼 접근 가능하지만, 일괄적인 접근 방식은 각 개인의 독특한 환경과 특성을 고려하지 않습니다. 또한 이러한 플랫폼의 신뢰성은 불투명합니다. 이러한 문제에도 불구하고, 온라인 코칭의 지지자들은 그들이 성공에 도움이 될 보장된 가치있는 통찰력을 제공한다고 주장합니다. 그러나, 제 개인적인 견해로는, 진정한 성공은 자기 신념과 지속적인 노력에 더 많이 의존하며, 이러한 요소들은 디지털 플랫폼에서 제공받을 수 없습니다.
결론적으로, 온라인 코칭에 대한 수요가 분명히 증가했지만, 이것이 반드시 개인의 자기 지도 능력에서 내재적인 부족을 시사하는 것은 아닙니다.
Good expressions:
1. at odds with its perceived supremacy - 그것의 인식된 우월성에 부정적인 입장을 취하다
2. succumbing to a paralyzing confusion - 마비시키는 혼란에 빠지다
3. a determined pursuit of one's objectives - 자신의 목표를 확고히 추구하는 것
In the modern era, the appeal of online coaching platforms has soared alongside the proliferation of the digital age. However, there is a debate concerning the superiority of these platforms over traditional in-person coaching. While some extol the virtues of this emerging trend, I find myself at odds with its perceived supremacy.
The rise in popularity for online coaching can, in part, be attributed to a societal lack of confidence and growing uncertainty about future prospects. In an era teeming with options, individuals often become lost, succumbing to a paralyzing confusion. The allure of online coaching is understandable in such predicaments, but it is my belief that individuals should take personal ownership of their goals and strive towards them. After all, a determined pursuit of one's objectives can serve as its own powerful form of coaching.
Additionally, while online coaching platforms are undeniably accessible, their one-size-fits-all approach does not account for the unique circumstances and traits of each individual. Furthermore, the reliability of these platforms is questionable. Despite these issues, proponents of online coaching argue that they offer valuable insights guaranteed to aid in one's success. However, it is my contention that true success hinges more on self-belief and persistent efforts, factors which can not be delivered by a digital platform.
In sum, while the demand for online coaching has undoubtedly surged, this does not necessarily signal an inherent inadequacy in individuals' self-guidance abilities.
Word count: 256
Essay translated in Korean:
현대시대에는 디지털 시대의 연장선상에서 온라인 코칭 플랫폼의 매력이 급증했습니다. 그러나 이러한 플랫폼이 전통적인 대면 코칭보다 우월한지에 대한 논란이 있습니다. 일부는 이 새로운 추세를 칭송하지만, 저는 그것의 우월성에 부정적인 입장을 취하고 있습니다.
온라인 코칭에 대한 인기 상승은 일정 부분, 사회적인 자신감 부족과 미래 전망에 대한 지속적인 불확실성 때문일 것입니다. 선택지가 많은 시대에서, 사람들은 종종 자신을 잃고 혼란스러운 상태에 빠져들곤 합니다. 이러한 상황에서 온라인 코칭의 매력은 이해할 수 있으나, 개인이 자신의 목표를 직접 정하고 그것을 향해 노력해야 한다고 믿습니다. 결국, 자신의 목표를 확고히 추구하는 것은 자체로 강력한 코칭의 형태가 될 수 있습니다.
또한, 온라인 코칭 플랫폼은 의심할 만큼 접근 가능하지만, 일괄적인 접근 방식은 각 개인의 독특한 환경과 특성을 고려하지 않습니다. 또한 이러한 플랫폼의 신뢰성은 불투명합니다. 이러한 문제에도 불구하고, 온라인 코칭의 지지자들은 그들이 성공에 도움이 될 보장된 가치있는 통찰력을 제공한다고 주장합니다. 그러나, 제 개인적인 견해로는, 진정한 성공은 자기 신념과 지속적인 노력에 더 많이 의존하며, 이러한 요소들은 디지털 플랫폼에서 제공받을 수 없습니다.
결론적으로, 온라인 코칭에 대한 수요가 분명히 증가했지만, 이것이 반드시 개인의 자기 지도 능력에서 내재적인 부족을 시사하는 것은 아닙니다.
Good expressions:
1. at odds with its perceived supremacy - 그것의 인식된 우월성에 부정적인 입장을 취하다
2. succumbing to a paralyzing confusion - 마비시키는 혼란에 빠지다
3. a determined pursuit of one's objectives - 자신의 목표를 확고히 추구하는 것
제출한 라이팅
The demand for coaching services has grown significantly in the digital age, with online coaching platforms becoming prevalent. Some now feel online coaching is a superior option to in-person coaching. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, coaching services are becoming more common among individuals, and the desire for online coaching programs has significantly increased. It is believed that online coaching is more important than in-person coaching. I think this idea is unjustifiable, and I disagree with it.
First and foremost, the increasing desire for online coaching is attributed to a lack of self-confidence and diligence among people. In my view, society is bombarded with various ideas and purposes in this modern era, causing people to become more confused and lose sight of their potential futures. However, individuals should strive to choose a specific goal and work diligently towards it. By doing so, they can focus on their purpose and become their own coaches.
Moreover, some online coaching programs are not trustworthy, and their schedules may not work for everyone. Individuals seeking a better life have different personalities and circumstances, which online coaching does not always consider.
Some might argue that online coaching services provide essential and unique information that helps everyone succeed. However, I believe that the most important factors leading to success are practice and self-belief. Many great men and women did not have access to coaches; they believed in themselves and worked hard until they achieved their goals.
In conclusion, the growing desire for online coaching services does not mean that individuals are unable to lead themselves, as mentioned above.
Nowadays, coaching services are becoming more common among individuals, and the desire for online coaching programs has significantly increased. It is believed that online coaching is more important than in-person coaching. I think this idea is unjustifiable, and I disagree with it.
First and foremost, the increasing desire for online coaching is attributed to a lack of self-confidence and diligence among people. In my view, society is bombarded with various ideas and purposes in this modern era, causing people to become more confused and lose sight of their potential futures. However, individuals should strive to choose a specific goal and work diligently towards it. By doing so, they can focus on their purpose and become their own coaches.
Moreover, some online coaching programs are not trustworthy, and their schedules may not work for everyone. Individuals seeking a better life have different personalities and circumstances, which online coaching does not always consider.
Some might argue that online coaching services provide essential and unique information that helps everyone succeed. However, I believe that the most important factors leading to success are practice and self-belief. Many great men and women did not have access to coaches; they believed in themselves and worked hard until they achieved their goals.
In conclusion, the growing desire for online coaching services does not mean that individuals are unable to lead themselves, as mentioned above.
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