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  • Two parts

Many supermarkets are selling more and more products that are imported from other countries instead of selling food that is locally sourced. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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    Evaluation

    Task Response: 7
    The essay adequately addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing the reasons for supermarkets selling imported products and providing a clear opinion on whether this is positive or negative. The points made are relevant and supported with examples and explanations. However, there is room for improvement in terms of providing a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument.

    Coherence & Cohesion: 6
    The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The ideas are mostly coherent and connected, but there are some instances where the link between sentences and paragraphs could be stronger. Additionally, the paragraph structure could be improved by using topic sentences and providing more transitions between ideas.

    Lexical Resource: 6
    The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary, using some advanced words and phrases such as "regional environment" and "transferring process." However, there are also instances of repetition and some inaccuracies in word choice, such as "biased products" instead of "foreign products." More varied and precise vocabulary would improve the essay.

    Grammatical Range & Accuracy: 6
    The student shows a reasonable range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences and conditional clauses. However, there are also some grammatical errors, such as incorrect verb tenses ("they need to get" instead of "they need to get") and ambiguous pronoun references ("there will be many of them finding financial aid"). Some sentences could also be restructured for clarity and coherence.

    Overall: 6.5
    Based on the assessment of the four criteria, the overall band score for this essay would be 6.5. The student demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and provides relevant arguments, but there is room for improvement in terms of coherence, vocabulary, and grammatical accuracy.
    스코어팩토리 AI가 작성한 모범답안입니다.
    Many supermarkets are selling more and more products that are imported from other countries instead of selling food that is locally sourced. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
    Essay:

    Many supermarkets nowadays choose to sell imported products from other countries rather than locally sourced food. This trend can be attributed to various factors, including the limitations of the local environment, the complexities involved in the transfer process, and the cheaper labor costs associated with global workforces. However, I believe that this development has a negative impact on the domestic economy.

    One of the key reasons why supermarkets opt for international goods is the difficulty in sourcing specific items locally. For instance, in urban areas with cold climates, it is almost impossible to find organic tropical fruits such as mangoes or bananas. Consequently, these supermarkets have to rely on importing them from countries with more favorable climates. Additionally, selling local products can involve complicated and costly transfer procedures, making it more financially viable for supermarkets to import goods from third countries.

    Moreover, the lower minimum wages of international workers enable supermarkets to offer imported products at much lower prices. This affordability attracts consumers who are more inclined to purchase these items, further fueling the preference for international goods. However, this shift towards importing can have detrimental effects on the economy of the country.
    제출한 라이팅
    A lot of supermarkets import merchandise from other nations, instead they sell their local food. This is because of the regional environment, expensive transfer process, and cheap expenses for global workforces, but I think this is a negative development due to its domestic economy.

    There are several reasons why they prefer international goods. To begin with, it may not be easy to look for specific items in the local area. If it is a cold urban city, it is almost impossible to find organic tropical fruits like mangoes or bananas, so they need to get them from tropical countries. Secondly, selling their original products might be a complicated transferring process, which takes up more budgets than importing from a third country. Lastly, it is because the international workers’ minimum wages can be less than domestic ones, the prices of products are also much lower.

    I think it is a bad situation for the economic system of the country. If they rely on international stuff and appeal to consume biased products for consumers, their inner market condition can be going bad. It can lead employees to lose their jobs because there are many worthy workers out of the country. Since the number of job seekers has increased, there will be many of them finding financial aid, and the government’s help. Even the financial administrations can collapse, since people can not have any conditions to work.

    In conclusion, there are many markets that sell international products rather than local ones because of the environmental condition of the place, high-cost conveying procedure, and inexpensive wage for overseas workers, but due to the national finance, I think it is a negative development.

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